The second component of “victimism” is fairness obsession (sometimes that manifests in an obsession with unfairness). It may be the trickiest element to wrap our heads around. We focus so much attention and effort on fairness; and who can be against fairness, right?
Working toward the equal protection of rights or wanting to see all people treated without harm are worthy and admirable goals. But even though we want things to be fair, we live in an imperfect world where life simply is not fair.
Is it fair that some are born with super-intelligence, brilliant singing voices, movie-star-good-looks, and amazing athletic prowess while the rest of us are pretty average? Is it fair that some are born with painful or debilitating diseases, while the rest of us lead fairly normal lives?
The good news is that life doesn’t have to be fair to be absolutely wonderful and fulfilling! We don’t have the same wealth as the Rockefellers, but we can be just as happy, if not happier. We can’t fly but we don’t obsess over the fact that birds have wings and we don’t have them.
Why would we obsess over other inequities in this crazy world that will always be unfair? What if we could all find happiness without comparing ourselves to others, or to our expectations of “fairness?”